Okay so I get it. Spring forward is hard on everyone. We all lose an hour of sleep. In my younger days it was an hour less I had up watching tv or at some arbitrary party and I was invariably going to sleep in the next day so in reality what did it matter to me? No as I have become wiser (aka old) this is no longer the case. Spring forward is now not just a day it's the week or so it take my kids to acclimate to the fact that their perfect schedule was shifted by an hour an nobody told them.
Lets take this year for example. As you all remember this past Saturday we "sprang forward" if you will. Well everyone sprang except my 4 year old. I mean come on even my 1 year old was hip to the game and jumped right into the new time. My oldest on the other hand it seems decided to protest all together and fall backwards instead. I mean seriously its like the universe is playing a trick in me. Last night my 4 year old who normally is in bed by 8 and sleeping most days by 8:30 was trying to have a conversation with me over the monitor at 10:45?!?!??!!!? Ummmm kid that is NOT okay. And on top of that he had the nerve to ask for some pretzels. I mean come on kid lets get some shut eye for everyone sake.
So tonight I ask you to wish me luck. Lets all hope and pray that this kid decided that he is willing to conform to society and acknowledge that the clock shifted and not stay awake serenading all of the neighborhood with a rousing version of "you've got a friend in me" from toy story which at some points sounds like wolves howling at the moon at full blast. Lets all just hope and pray
Wednesday, March 13, 2013
Wednesday, March 6, 2013
the worst thing ever about being a working mom
Okay so most days being a working mom is fine. Somehow I manage to balance my kids, job, husband and a zillion other things just fine but then there are days like today where it is all really hard and most things come crashing down on my head. Why today you ask? well today started with me trying to negotiate with my oldest just to leave the house. Yes he was not on board with the "Mommy going to work and Daddy taking us to school" plan that the adults in the household derived so the convo of all convos ensued
Me: "Bye RJ, love you, I will pick you up today okay?"
RJ: "Where are you going mommy?"
Me: "I have to go to work love"
RJ: "No stay with me."
Me: "But RJ you have to go to school. Daddy is going to take you remember?"
RJ: "Dont leave mommy"
So this continued for a while and finally I give in and just wait so this way I will leave at the same time they are headed to school. In my head this way Im not technically leaving them and hopefully I dont leave a wake of tears and 4 year old tantrum for my husband to clean up.
Fast forward to everyone leaving. So now we are all about to head out the door and all i hear is "Mommy will Woody be in your car when you pick me up?" so here we go again. For those of you who ready my previous post about the Toy Story curse you should know there is no way this conversation is going to end well unless I say yes and since my husband was taking them and I am picking up so here we go again.
RJ: "Mommy will Woody be in your car when you pick me up?"
Me: "not if you let him ride with you in Daddy's car to school. Why dont we put him in my car now?"
RJ: "No mommy, i want him to ride with me to school and then you can get him from Daddy"
- Seriously we live together how hard should it be to get a woody and 2 kids to and from school? -
So this convo continued for awhile but there here comes the kicker. The one moment where I it becomes painfully clear that I dont have it all and my balance although it works isnt perfect. I get in my car adn am backing out of the driveway and RJ is yelling for me to stop. I do and he yells "Dont leave us mommy!" from the backseat of my husbands car still in the garage and it broke my heart.
I know there will be many days when I have to go to work or be apart from my children and I get that and I also have a great job that is more than understanding when I need to come in late or leave early to be with my kids but in that moment none of that mattered. All that I felt was the pain of knowing i broke my 4 year olds heart (even if only for a moment - because of course all was well by the time they made it the mile to school) and how his response in return broke mine. So yes today I will pick them up a bit early and hug them a bit tighter and do what I can to restore my balance.
Okay second worse thing about being a working mom. Having to cut out of work early because your kid is sick and feeling guilty for cutting out early and guilty for not being home with your kid already since he dosent feel well. Yeah can you tell today has been a gem all around but that's okay. Tomorrow I will get the chance to live in my organized chaos all over again and I am grateful for that :-)
Me: "Bye RJ, love you, I will pick you up today okay?"
RJ: "Where are you going mommy?"
Me: "I have to go to work love"
RJ: "No stay with me."
Me: "But RJ you have to go to school. Daddy is going to take you remember?"
RJ: "Dont leave mommy"
So this continued for a while and finally I give in and just wait so this way I will leave at the same time they are headed to school. In my head this way Im not technically leaving them and hopefully I dont leave a wake of tears and 4 year old tantrum for my husband to clean up.
Fast forward to everyone leaving. So now we are all about to head out the door and all i hear is "Mommy will Woody be in your car when you pick me up?" so here we go again. For those of you who ready my previous post about the Toy Story curse you should know there is no way this conversation is going to end well unless I say yes and since my husband was taking them and I am picking up so here we go again.
RJ: "Mommy will Woody be in your car when you pick me up?"
Me: "not if you let him ride with you in Daddy's car to school. Why dont we put him in my car now?"
RJ: "No mommy, i want him to ride with me to school and then you can get him from Daddy"
- Seriously we live together how hard should it be to get a woody and 2 kids to and from school? -
So this convo continued for awhile but there here comes the kicker. The one moment where I it becomes painfully clear that I dont have it all and my balance although it works isnt perfect. I get in my car adn am backing out of the driveway and RJ is yelling for me to stop. I do and he yells "Dont leave us mommy!" from the backseat of my husbands car still in the garage and it broke my heart.
I know there will be many days when I have to go to work or be apart from my children and I get that and I also have a great job that is more than understanding when I need to come in late or leave early to be with my kids but in that moment none of that mattered. All that I felt was the pain of knowing i broke my 4 year olds heart (even if only for a moment - because of course all was well by the time they made it the mile to school) and how his response in return broke mine. So yes today I will pick them up a bit early and hug them a bit tighter and do what I can to restore my balance.
Okay second worse thing about being a working mom. Having to cut out of work early because your kid is sick and feeling guilty for cutting out early and guilty for not being home with your kid already since he dosent feel well. Yeah can you tell today has been a gem all around but that's okay. Tomorrow I will get the chance to live in my organized chaos all over again and I am grateful for that :-)
Saturday, March 2, 2013
Why Mrs Mayer and I don't see eye to eye
Okay so I have waited awhile (okay not really the internal memo has really only been out a week or so) but it feels like it has been forever. Why you ask.... not because I disagree with the new Yahoo policy to prevent all workers from working from home (which I do) but because it seems that in this policy there is no other way than her own. Yes we get it Marissa you have decided that you will be superwoman. You will return to work 2 weeks after having a baby, you will work a zillion and two hours a week (from the office apparently), you will rise in the corporate ranks to ceo and your family will not take a backseat (or so you claim) but I would like to propose the counter argument. I too have decided to be superwoman. I returned to work 12 weeks after having both my first and second child, I work ~40 hours a week in the office (sometimes less because inevitably something crazy happens once a week that requires my attention or at least my body to be at home), and I make sure that my family never take a backseat. But what am trying to say is not that my path to working motherhood is correct and hers is not what I propose is that my path is the right path for me
There is no way I could make the choices Marissa had (even if it meant being CEO or whatever fancy title). My choices work for me and my family (and thankfully my boss and company) and they may not haven me ending up in the CEO seat .... but you never know they may. Luckily and thankfully I work for a company that values me as a person. I am allowed to work from home when needed and it is fine that on most days my work stays at work which means I am free to come home and really enjoy my time at home with family not stressing or worrying about missing and email that may come in at 8pm.
But enough about my choices back to the memo at hand. [for those of you who have not read the memo here it is] The memo is what it is and implies that working from home is less productive than going in to the office (which for me it is not but for some it may be) and for her that may be the case but as I mentioned earlier there seems to be no alternative. There are many positions and people that are very conducive (thank goodness for spellcheck I almost really messed that word up) to working from home, granted CEO is not one of those positions, but in this company there seems to be no options for that. There also seems to be no flexibility for those that may need to work from home or even better those that accepted the job with the promise of additional flexibility. For those people a job that now has no flexibility (which may not be what they signed up for) is now their only option if they want a job at all. Although I dont work at Yahoo I can tell you that a move like this from my company would make me fell undervalued and like a number, almost as if my family and life outside of company walls dont matter to them and in my humble opinion there is no quicker way to kill morale and productivity than to make me feel that way.
I am interested to see how this turns out for Yahoo (although I suspect it will crash and burn from a morale perspective). How many people will feel isolated and eventually leave? How much will it drop the morale? How much will people resent the CEO and HR for making this sweeping policy? Only time will tell the answers here but all I can say is Mrs Mayer and I dont see eye to eye on this one because we cant and shouldnt all make the same decisions she has and will but that does not make our choices any less right for us.
There is no way I could make the choices Marissa had (even if it meant being CEO or whatever fancy title). My choices work for me and my family (and thankfully my boss and company) and they may not haven me ending up in the CEO seat .... but you never know they may. Luckily and thankfully I work for a company that values me as a person. I am allowed to work from home when needed and it is fine that on most days my work stays at work which means I am free to come home and really enjoy my time at home with family not stressing or worrying about missing and email that may come in at 8pm.
But enough about my choices back to the memo at hand. [for those of you who have not read the memo here it is] The memo is what it is and implies that working from home is less productive than going in to the office (which for me it is not but for some it may be) and for her that may be the case but as I mentioned earlier there seems to be no alternative. There are many positions and people that are very conducive (thank goodness for spellcheck I almost really messed that word up) to working from home, granted CEO is not one of those positions, but in this company there seems to be no options for that. There also seems to be no flexibility for those that may need to work from home or even better those that accepted the job with the promise of additional flexibility. For those people a job that now has no flexibility (which may not be what they signed up for) is now their only option if they want a job at all. Although I dont work at Yahoo I can tell you that a move like this from my company would make me fell undervalued and like a number, almost as if my family and life outside of company walls dont matter to them and in my humble opinion there is no quicker way to kill morale and productivity than to make me feel that way.
I am interested to see how this turns out for Yahoo (although I suspect it will crash and burn from a morale perspective). How many people will feel isolated and eventually leave? How much will it drop the morale? How much will people resent the CEO and HR for making this sweeping policy? Only time will tell the answers here but all I can say is Mrs Mayer and I dont see eye to eye on this one because we cant and shouldnt all make the same decisions she has and will but that does not make our choices any less right for us.
Friday, March 1, 2013
my first official blog and my toy story curse
Okay so in reality this is my second blog but in my mind the "why i started this blog" blog does not count.... so here goes. Okay so I have 2 kids (1 and 4) and the oldest is obsessed with Toy Story (and obsessed is not an exaggeration). He would watch those 3 movies on repeat all day every day and in his sleep if I would let him. He also has a million woody action figure things; 764,289 Buzz lightyear toys; 209,874 T-Rex somethings and a zillion other things related to and covered in Toy Story. This by the way is not at all annoying when he is looking for 1 particular buzz lightyear that is max 3 inches high that was on his birthday cake 2 months ago but I digress.
How did this Toy Story obsession start you might ask. Well apparently my husband and I brought this on ourselves. So about 2 years ago my oldest was obsessed with The Backyardigans (yes I am a mom that let my 2 year old watch TV - I didnt let the kid watch the news or anything at all on Showtime, just NickJr so in my head its not that bad) and neither my husband nor I could take anymore of these made up singing animals playing in their imaginary backyard so my husband suggested we try letting him watch a movie. Nemo was voted down because I remember the sharks being scary to my younger cousin, Lion King was also a no as Symba had to watch his dad die, so after going through millions of supposedly G rated Disney movies we happened upon Toy Story. Now that seemed innocent enough and my husband actually made a copy of the movie and edited out the 2 places where the said "shut-up" and took out the majority of the scary neighbor kid named Sid so we figured it would be tame enough to give us a break.
Fast forward 2 years where now my house and my life has been invaded by Toy Story. Yes that is my son playing outside mind you in woody pajamas (no he never takes them off and he has rallied his aunts into giving him a combined like 5 pair so in theory there is always a clean pair). Now how bad can that be you ask..... well let me tell you. Have you every tried to take a 4 year old out of his favorite (and i mean favorite thing) anything to do normal things (such as go to school or church or the store)? No you haven't? Well imagine trying to fight WWII with 1 bow and arrow. Okay so the 1 fight wasnt really that bad but did you notice the hat? Oh you didnt huh? Well he has 1 for everyday of the week (thanks again Poppa and Mema and I think Godmomma Monica contributed to that collection as well). I know you really dont believe me about the hats so I included a few of his favorites in pictures.
So now not only do we have the pajama discussion before leaving the house we also have the hat as a negotiation point. Can't imagine? Let me illustrate it for you.
RJ: "Mommy I dont want to put on my clothes."
Me: "Rj you have to get dressed its time for school."
RJ: "But Mommy I want to wear my Woody pajamas, they are my favorite."
Me: "We can wear them tonight after bath."
after 5 more minutes of hemming and hawing (never actually used that phrase written down and if I used it correctly Im impressed with myself)
RJ: "Fine mommy but can I wear my hat?"
So now I want you to imagine having that conversation every morning :-). Fun times I tell you. So why do I call it a curse you ask.... not because my oldest loves it.... but because he seems to be passing it on to his brother
With that said let me add my youngest is only 1.... I cannot take 3 more years of these 3 movies.... I can tell you how it ends kids. They all end up together. Andy goes to college and gives the toys to Bonnie.
How did this Toy Story obsession start you might ask. Well apparently my husband and I brought this on ourselves. So about 2 years ago my oldest was obsessed with The Backyardigans (yes I am a mom that let my 2 year old watch TV - I didnt let the kid watch the news or anything at all on Showtime, just NickJr so in my head its not that bad) and neither my husband nor I could take anymore of these made up singing animals playing in their imaginary backyard so my husband suggested we try letting him watch a movie. Nemo was voted down because I remember the sharks being scary to my younger cousin, Lion King was also a no as Symba had to watch his dad die, so after going through millions of supposedly G rated Disney movies we happened upon Toy Story. Now that seemed innocent enough and my husband actually made a copy of the movie and edited out the 2 places where the said "shut-up" and took out the majority of the scary neighbor kid named Sid so we figured it would be tame enough to give us a break.
Birthday Hat (was a gift - Mommy and Daddy won't be purchasing anymore hats)
Hat from his Halloween Costume (he was Puss in Boots - no clue how i convinced him not to be Woody)
His woody hat in Brown on his Avatar Day
The Woody Hat in original form
Red Woody Hat (because why have just 1 color)
So now not only do we have the pajama discussion before leaving the house we also have the hat as a negotiation point. Can't imagine? Let me illustrate it for you.
RJ: "Mommy I dont want to put on my clothes."
Me: "Rj you have to get dressed its time for school."
RJ: "But Mommy I want to wear my Woody pajamas, they are my favorite."
Me: "We can wear them tonight after bath."
after 5 more minutes of hemming and hawing (never actually used that phrase written down and if I used it correctly Im impressed with myself)
RJ: "Fine mommy but can I wear my hat?"
So now I want you to imagine having that conversation every morning :-). Fun times I tell you. So why do I call it a curse you ask.... not because my oldest loves it.... but because he seems to be passing it on to his brother
Thanks Auntie Mona for the matching set
Hats all around
With that said let me add my youngest is only 1.... I cannot take 3 more years of these 3 movies.... I can tell you how it ends kids. They all end up together. Andy goes to college and gives the toys to Bonnie.
so a bit about me to get started
okay so here goes.... I'm new to blogging but after this week it seemed the appropriate thing to do. Well let me go back a couple days so you will understand. Earlier this week (Monday i think... but in reality sometimes my days run together so that is my best guess for the moment) I started to get sick. Now I am not referring to cute sick with just a little sniffle and a cough every now and then, I mean for real throat aching, coughing non stop, ugly sick. With this said by Tuesday I had no (and i mean absolutely no) voice to mention. For some people that is not a big deal but for me it was earth shattering (okay that might have been a bit of an exaggeration)... so maybe not earth shattering but it was big. For those that dont know me let me explain. In general I am a talker (self admitted) so being silenced involuntarily was harsh.
Now of course (not really sure i should have started a new paragraph there but I digress) people who know me immediately responded by informing me of just how hard it must be for me to not talk and all i could think every time some unsuspecting co-worker said "Man, this must be so hard for you" is "dang, do I really talk that much?"..... and 5 second later I had the answer. Yes of course I really talk that much!!! I have loads and loads to say. Now granted not all of what I have to say is useful or relevant to any conversation that is currently happening (trust me ask my husband) but I do have tons to say. So sitting home all week silently (because clearly I don't have the self control to got to work and not talk... I am in marketing so talking is par for the course and I have 2 kids and a husband so clearly the only time I can actually sit silent is when none of them is actually in the house with me) all i could think was man I do have lots to say (and clearly nobody to say it to). AHHHHHHHHH and my blog was born.
Granted I am not promising some brilliant blog that you absolutely adore but I do promise to share my thoughts and some of my life (hey I am not those Kardashian sisters so you are clearly not getting full access) with you and hope you enjoy.
Now of course (not really sure i should have started a new paragraph there but I digress) people who know me immediately responded by informing me of just how hard it must be for me to not talk and all i could think every time some unsuspecting co-worker said "Man, this must be so hard for you" is "dang, do I really talk that much?"..... and 5 second later I had the answer. Yes of course I really talk that much!!! I have loads and loads to say. Now granted not all of what I have to say is useful or relevant to any conversation that is currently happening (trust me ask my husband) but I do have tons to say. So sitting home all week silently (because clearly I don't have the self control to got to work and not talk... I am in marketing so talking is par for the course and I have 2 kids and a husband so clearly the only time I can actually sit silent is when none of them is actually in the house with me) all i could think was man I do have lots to say (and clearly nobody to say it to). AHHHHHHHHH and my blog was born.
Granted I am not promising some brilliant blog that you absolutely adore but I do promise to share my thoughts and some of my life (hey I am not those Kardashian sisters so you are clearly not getting full access) with you and hope you enjoy.
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